As a paramedic, Rachel was used to supporting others through crisis — not experiencing it herself. During a pregnancy complicated by hyperemesis, she faced overwhelming anxiety, sadness, and a sense of hopelessness that left the ‘helper’ feeling completely disoriented.

Navigating pregnancy and postpartum in a new country, Lisa felt increasingly isolated without familiar support around her. When her newborn was taken to the special care nursery without explanation, and her concerns were repeatedly dismissed, she was left feeling unseen, unheard, and not held for years.

When Amber-Lee found herself unexpectedly pregnant, she knew life would change — but not in the ways she experienced. Through two pregnancies complicated by hyperemesis, a traumatic birth, and a challenging postpartum period, she navigated trauma, mental ill health, and the pressure of being ‘the strong one’ while silently struggling.

After birth, Natalie’s insomnia quickly spiralled into a mental health crisis, with sleepless nights giving way to panic, hallucinations, and the fear she would never sleep again. At her most vulnerable, she reached a breaking point that led her to seek urgent support.

Kristy had long coped with anxiety and depression by staying busy, but after infertility, birth trauma, and a decline in postpartum mental health, those familiar coping strategies no longer worked. As she struggled with the stillness of motherhood, an unexpected ADHD diagnosis reframed everything she thought she knew about herself.

Chloe’s story moves through a series of places that marked the height of her anxiety and melancholic depression — from hospital wards after a retained placenta to the streets where she pushed her pram while fighting suicidal ideation. From emergency departments to a mother-and-baby unit admission, she navigated severe symptoms and the challenge of accepting help.

Dayna’s story reflects what it can feel like when trauma compounds. After a complicated emergency caesarean and separation from her baby, she was left without the newborn bubble she had hoped for. What followed was ongoing anxiety, panic, rage, and hypervigilance, alongside D-MER and the lasting impact of birth trauma within a strained health system.

OCD had been part of Emma’s life for many years, though it went unrecognised until early motherhood, following pregnancy loss and the birth of a premature baby during lockdown. What followed was an OCD crisis marked by depression, shame, and the challenges of accessing support. Emma reflects on the process of understanding her diagnosis and the role of acceptance, writing, and community in her recovery.

After a traumatic first birth, Laura entered her second pregnancy hoping for a different experience — a ‘redo’. But complications and a precipitous labour led to a second postpartum marked by flashbacks, insomnia, panic, and depression — an undoing rather than a redoing. Laura reflects on the impacts of birth trauma, and the process of rebuilding with the support she was able to access.

After a positive first postpartum experience, Jess never expected her next pregnancy to be any different — until she discovered she was carrying twins. As intrusive thoughts and compulsions intensified, her mental health rapidly declined, and the demands of caring for multiples compounded the feeling that she wasn’t enough. Despite support from acute mental health services, her symptoms escalated into hallucinations and psychosis.

As a midwife with no history of mental ill health, Caitlin never expected to develop severe postpartum depression and anxiety after the birth of her second child. Her condition escalated to the point of requiring an eight-week psychiatric admission in the same hospital where she worked, followed by electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) for treatment-resistant depression. Caitlin reflects on her journey through diagnosis, treatment, and the return of hope.

During pregnancy, Tessa was admitted to a mother-and-baby psychiatric unit and made a promise to her unborn baby that they would never return. But the pressures of early postpartum and perfectionism led to a return to the MBU — not once, but twice. Tessa reflects on learning to accept support, let go of shame, and recognise just how far she has come in her recovery.

After a straightforward physiological birth, Amelia experienced a sudden postpartum haemorrhage that separated her from her newborn and triggered an acute mental health crisis. She developed mania, insomnia, and postpartum psychosis, which she largely concealed from her care providers until she sought urgent help. Amelia reflects on the challenges of recognition, recovery, and preparing for a subsequent pregnancy with her mental health in mind.

Jessie’s story begins in early motherhood, when she was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and experienced vivid intrusive thoughts, panic attacks, and persistent distress. After relocating to rural NSW for family support, she struggled to access the right professional care. Jessie shares how advocating for herself helped change the trajectory of her motherhood experience.

Birth trauma shaped much of Claire’s early motherhood, impacting her mental and physical health in ways she never expected, alongside the challenges of border closures and a difficult feeding journey. When ‘failure to thrive’ was applied to her son, it became a label she internalised herself. Claire reflects on her experience of anxiety, PTSD, and learning to reconnect with herself as she redefined what it means to thrive.

In this personal episode, Rebecca shares her experience of a second pregnancy — one she had hoped would feel different. As she reflects on the similarities and differences from her first, she speaks openly about the conflicting emotions of pregnancy, including hope, fear, and uncertainty, and the support systems she is putting in place as she approaches birth, given her history of tokophobia, PTSD, and OCD.

As a perinatal and infant mental health psychologist, Ashlee expected the transition to motherhood to come naturally. Instead, she experienced severe anxiety in pregnancy and depression in postpartum, missing her own red flags while navigating feeding, sleep, and health challenges with her daughter. Ashlee reflects on the complexity of recognising mental ill health in motherhood, alongside her diagnosis of autism, and her journey towards seeking support and recovery.

With a background in child development psychology, Siobhan expected to feel prepared for motherhood. Instead, a traumatic birth and intense sleep deprivation during lockdown led to a postpartum experience marked by anxiety, depression, and, at its most severe, hallucinations and suicidal ideation. Siobhan reflects on the impact on her sense of self and the supports that helped her move towards recovery.

With a background in social work, Gemma didn’t expect the transition to motherhood to feel so disorienting. From early pregnancy, she experienced a profound sense of identity loss and anxiety, followed by a challenging postpartum marked by guilt and unmet expectations. Gemma reflects on the barriers she faced accessing support, and how reconnecting with herself — through therapy, work, and movement — helped her find her footing in motherhood.

After leaving the mother-and-baby unit, Sarah felt proud of her recovery — but her story didn’t end there. A relapse marked by severe depression led to further hospital admissions, forcing her to confront the reality of non-linear healing and its impact on her sense of self, including her experience as a self-confessed ‘frequent flyer’ of the MBU. In part two, Sarah reflects on the tension between progress, setback, and identity.