Perinatal Anxiety & OCD

As a paramedic, Rachel was used to supporting others through crisis — not experiencing it herself. During a pregnancy complicated by hyperemesis, she faced overwhelming anxiety, sadness, and a sense of hopelessness that left the ‘helper’ feeling completely disoriented.

For the first three months of her daughter’s life, Sarah put on a brave face while anxiety and insomnia quietly intensified behind the scenes. When she could no longer hide the severity of her illness, she finally said, ‘I need serious help’, marking the beginning of her journey towards finding the support she needed.

OCD had been part of Emma’s life for many years, though it went unrecognised until early motherhood, following pregnancy loss and the birth of a premature baby during lockdown. What followed was an OCD crisis marked by depression, shame, and the challenges of accessing support. Emma reflects on the process of understanding her diagnosis and the role of acceptance, writing, and community in her recovery.

Jessie’s story begins in early motherhood, when she was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and experienced vivid intrusive thoughts, panic attacks, and persistent distress. After relocating to rural NSW for family support, she struggled to access the right professional care. Jessie shares how advocating for herself helped change the trajectory of her motherhood experience.

In this personal episode, Rebecca shares her experience of a second pregnancy — one she had hoped would feel different. As she reflects on the similarities and differences from her first, she speaks openly about the conflicting emotions of pregnancy, including hope, fear, and uncertainty, and the support systems she is putting in place as she approaches birth, given her history of tokophobia, PTSD, and OCD.

As a perinatal and infant mental health psychologist, Ashlee expected the transition to motherhood to come naturally. Instead, she experienced severe anxiety in pregnancy and depression in postpartum, missing her own red flags while navigating feeding, sleep, and health challenges with her daughter. Ashlee reflects on the complexity of recognising mental ill health in motherhood, alongside her diagnosis of autism, and her journey towards seeking support and recovery.

With a background in child development psychology, Siobhan expected to feel prepared for motherhood. Instead, a traumatic birth and intense sleep deprivation during lockdown led to a postpartum experience marked by anxiety, depression, and, at its most severe, hallucinations and suicidal ideation. Siobhan reflects on the impact on her sense of self and the supports that helped her move towards recovery.

During postpartum, Sarah experienced anxiety, OCD, and depression that gradually eroded her sense of self. As her symptoms intensified, she was forced to confront her assumptions about mental health and recovery. Part one follows her journey towards seeking support, including medication and her first admission to a mother-and-baby unit.

With a history of anxiety and depression, Jess entered pregnancy with a plan to protect her mental health. But when her son required urgent medical care and a prolonged NICU stay, her own wellbeing was overshadowed by the demands of caring for a critically unwell baby. She reflects on the lasting impact of the NICU experience, and the journey of finding herself again in motherhood.

After years of infertility, IVF, and complex pregnancies, Emma entered motherhood already carrying a significant emotional load. Antenatal anxiety, birth trauma, and further life stressors compounded her mental health, eventually leading to an admission to a mother-and-baby unit. Emma reflects on her journey towards prioritising her own healing, and how her experience has shaped her advocacy for other mothers.

After an ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, and baby loss, Jade finally brought her daughter River earthside — but instead of the newborn bubble she had imagined, she was met with relentless distress as her baby struggled with severe colic. Following years of cumulative grief and anxiety, Jade describes a ‘crash’ that overwhelmed her emotionally and physically. It was only when her mother-in-law stepped in that she was able to access the support she needed.

Bubbly and outgoing, Nikolina had never experienced mental ill health before motherhood. But within weeks of giving birth, she was confronted by the sudden onset of perinatal anxiety and depression, with symptoms including insomnia, tearfulness, and an overwhelming sense of not being herself. As she pushed through in silence, she marked time against her baby’s milestones, hoping things would improve by six weeks — until her husband helped her recognise that she needed support.

Like everything else in her life, Jess had carefully planned for motherhood — but during pregnancy, she was confronted by an all-consuming sense of dread and anxiety that went unrecognised. After the premature birth of her daughter at 28 weeks and a prolonged NICU stay, that anxiety briefly lifted, only to return more intensely once they arrived home. With the support of her care team and loved ones, Jess slowly found relief and began to experience the moments of motherhood she had long hoped for.

A successful economist and self-described high achiever, Kathryn entered motherhood expecting control and certainty — but quickly learned that perfectionism and motherhood do not mix. Her experience of perinatal OCD and depression challenged everything she thought she knew about herself, while her relationship with her psychiatrist became central to her recovery.

Rebecca had spent most of her life imagining motherhood — but not the mental breakdown that led to a psychiatric admission just days after her son’s birth. In part two, she reflects on a postpartum experience, shaped by OCD and PTSD, that unfolded in ways she never could have imagined.