Birth trauma shaped much of Claire’s early motherhood, impacting her mental and physical health in ways she never expected, alongside the challenges of border closures and a difficult feeding journey. When ‘failure to thrive’ was applied to her son, it became a label she internalised herself. Claire reflects on her experience of anxiety, PTSD, and learning to reconnect with herself as she redefined what it means to thrive.

In this personal episode, Rebecca shares her experience of a second pregnancy — one she had hoped would feel different. As she reflects on the similarities and differences from her first, she speaks openly about the conflicting emotions of pregnancy, including hope, fear, and uncertainty, and the support systems she is putting in place as she approaches birth, given her history of tokophobia, PTSD, and OCD.

As a perinatal and infant mental health psychologist, Ashlee expected the transition to motherhood to come naturally. Instead, she experienced severe anxiety in pregnancy and depression in postpartum, missing her own red flags while navigating feeding, sleep, and health challenges with her daughter. Ashlee reflects on the complexity of recognising mental ill health in motherhood, alongside her diagnosis of autism, and her journey towards seeking support and recovery.

With a background in child development psychology, Siobhan expected to feel prepared for motherhood. Instead, a traumatic birth and intense sleep deprivation during lockdown led to a postpartum experience marked by anxiety, depression, and, at its most severe, hallucinations and suicidal ideation. Siobhan reflects on the impact on her sense of self and the supports that helped her move towards recovery.

‘Are you feeding your baby?’ These were the words that confronted Elyse, an ICU nurse, one week postpartum when she was diagnosed with insufficient glandular tissue (IGT). Despite her relentless efforts to increase her supply, her mental health deteriorated, marked by grief, rage, and a growing sense of disconnection. Elyse reflects on the moment her need for additional support was recognised, and the process of letting go of pressure, control, and self-blame.

With a background in social work, Gemma didn’t expect the transition to motherhood to feel so disorienting. From early pregnancy, she experienced a profound sense of identity loss and anxiety, followed by a challenging postpartum marked by guilt and unmet expectations. Gemma reflects on the barriers she faced accessing support, and how reconnecting with herself — through therapy, work, and movement — helped her find her footing in motherhood.

After leaving the mother-and-baby unit, Sarah felt proud of her recovery — but her story didn’t end there. A relapse marked by severe depression led to further hospital admissions, forcing her to confront the reality of non-linear healing and its impact on her sense of self, including her experience as a self-confessed ‘frequent flyer’ of the MBU. In part two, Sarah reflects on the tension between progress, setback, and identity.

During postpartum, Sarah experienced anxiety, OCD, and depression that gradually eroded her sense of self. As her symptoms intensified, she was forced to confront her assumptions about mental health and recovery. Part one follows her journey towards seeking support, including medication and her first admission to a mother-and-baby unit.

Monique’s birth may have been quick, but its complications and long-term impacts were anything but. Following a traumatic birth, severe complications, and a near-death experience, she was left navigating the physical and psychological aftermath, which she describes as a ‘storm’ she is still weathering. Monique reflects on the realities of birth trauma and the supports that have helped her feel less alone.

As a psychologist, Gen was familiar with psychiatric wards — but she never expected to be admitted as a patient shortly after the birth of her son. Following a severe postpartum infection, her mental health rapidly declined, with delusions and hallucinations taking hold. Gen reflects on her experience of acute mental illness, the impact of stigma, and her journey towards recovery and advocacy.

With a history of anxiety and depression, Jess entered pregnancy with a plan to protect her mental health. But when her son required urgent medical care and a prolonged NICU stay, her own wellbeing was overshadowed by the demands of caring for a critically unwell baby. She reflects on the lasting impact of the NICU experience, and the journey of finding herself again in motherhood.

After years of infertility, IVF, and complex pregnancies, Emma entered motherhood already carrying a significant emotional load. Antenatal anxiety, birth trauma, and further life stressors compounded her mental health, eventually leading to an admission to a mother-and-baby unit. Emma reflects on her journey towards prioritising her own healing, and how her experience has shaped her advocacy for other mothers.

With a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, Taegan spent years preparing for motherhood, determined to manage her mental health. After a relatively manageable first postpartum, she expected a similar experience the second time — but instead experienced postpartum depression and rage, followed by an involuntary hospital admission. Taegan reflects on the unpredictability of navigating motherhood with a pre-existing mental health condition, and the role of self-compassion in her recovery.

Like many mothers, Sarah struggled during pregnancy to distinguish between normal symptoms and something more serious. With a history of health anxiety and chronic illness, this uncertainty was heightened — and at 35 weeks, her concerns were validated when she developed severe pre-eclampsia and nearly died. Sarah reflects on the trauma of a life-threatening pregnancy complication, the challenges of bonding with her baby afterwards, and the role of support and planning in recovery.

After an ectopic pregnancy, miscarriage, and baby loss, Jade finally brought her daughter River earthside — but instead of the newborn bubble she had imagined, she was met with relentless distress as her baby struggled with severe colic. Following years of cumulative grief and anxiety, Jade describes a ‘crash’ that overwhelmed her emotionally and physically. It was only when her mother-in-law stepped in that she was able to access the support she needed.

Bubbly and outgoing, Nikolina had never experienced mental ill health before motherhood. But within weeks of giving birth, she was confronted by the sudden onset of perinatal anxiety and depression, with symptoms including insomnia, tearfulness, and an overwhelming sense of not being herself. As she pushed through in silence, she marked time against her baby’s milestones, hoping things would improve by six weeks — until her husband helped her recognise that she needed support.

As a self-confessed ‘flaming extrovert’, Lauren struggled with the isolating and repetitive rhythm of early motherhood. With a history of IVF, miscarriage, pregnancy complications, and traumatic births, the intense love she felt after both births was overshadowed by the onset of postpartum depression by six months postpartum.

Despite her expertise as a midwife and academic, Helen describes her perinatal mental health experience with one word: ‘blindsided’. She developed post-traumatic stress disorder following a traumatic pregnancy marked by pre-eclampsia, IUGR, and a NICU admission, compounded by baby loss and ongoing IVF uncertainty. She reflects on the profound impact of psychological trauma in the perinatal period, both personally and professionally.

After the birth of her son, Jade’s mental health declined amidst ongoing sleep deprivation and she was initially misdiagnosed with postpartum depression. Despite years of seeking support and trying multiple treatments, she continued to experience depressive episodes. It wasn’t until she saw a perinatal psychiatrist that she received a different diagnosis — a turning point that brought both clarity and grief.

Like everything else in her life, Jess had carefully planned for motherhood — but during pregnancy, she was confronted by an all-consuming sense of dread and anxiety that went unrecognised. After the premature birth of her daughter at 28 weeks and a prolonged NICU stay, that anxiety briefly lifted, only to return more intensely once they arrived home. With the support of her care team and loved ones, Jess slowly found relief and began to experience the moments of motherhood she had long hoped for.