For the first three months of her daughter’s life, Sarah put on a brave face while anxiety and insomnia quietly intensified behind the scenes. When she could no longer hide the severity of her illness, she finally said, ‘I need serious help’, marking the beginning of her journey towards finding the support she needed.

With a background in child development psychology, Siobhan expected to feel prepared for motherhood. Instead, a traumatic birth and intense sleep deprivation during lockdown led to a postpartum experience marked by anxiety, depression, and, at its most severe, hallucinations and suicidal ideation. Siobhan reflects on the impact on her sense of self and the supports that helped her move towards recovery.

‘Are you feeding your baby?’ These were the words that confronted Elyse, an ICU nurse, one week postpartum when she was diagnosed with insufficient glandular tissue (IGT). Despite her relentless efforts to increase her supply, her mental health deteriorated, marked by grief, rage, and a growing sense of disconnection. Elyse reflects on the moment her need for additional support was recognised, and the process of letting go of pressure, control, and self-blame.

Rebecca had spent most of her life imagining motherhood — but not the mental breakdown that led to a psychiatric admission just days after her son’s birth. In part two, she reflects on a postpartum experience, shaped by OCD and PTSD, that unfolded in ways she never could have imagined.